Stop with the Buts

Of course, I am not against police, for heaven's sake, I have family members and friends who are police officers and deputies. Law enforcement officers whom I love, respect, and know to be honest, fair, kind, upstanding members of our society. And, to my friends and families who don't understand why people in every state and across the world are protesting. Many of whom have said they are appalled at what happened to George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Eric Garner, and the countless others, BUT.

BUT. That one word is actually the problem. This is what seems to happen every.single.time it is uttered. The argument goes something like this, "Yes, ____ death was absolutely wrong, BUT.

That BUT, negates any acknowledgement of a systematic problem. That BUT allows the status quo a free pass because the person always thinks in terms of exceptions.

What about the IF. That argument goes something like this. Well, IF _______ had _________, then maybe the cops wouldn't have been called. Or, IF ________ wasn't _________. Or another, IF _____ has a history of _______. All end with the same conclusion, the Black person dead, and the person with the BUT or IF feeling this most recent death is just an anomaly, year after year.

I am very much FOR police. One can be FOR police and against police brutality.

One can be FOR Black, Brown, and POC of color and still against police brutality.

It is not an Either / Or world we are living in.

Yes, Blue Lives Matter. I HAVE FAMILY THAT IS A PART OF THAT STATEMENT! But the global conversation that is currently underway is this:

Do BLACK LIVES, the thousands whom have died at the hands of cops, MATTER?

You see, I have some skin in the game. Let me tell you some of my friends' names: Carolyn, Brandi, Sharon, Tonia, Roz, Robin, Arlene, Leya, Michelle, Pamela, Angie, Breanna, Holly, Terri, Dawn, Keisha. These are some of my Black friends.
I usually don't choose to identify them on the basis of their skin, but that distinction is relevant to this discussion. As I have shared life with these friends, some whom I have taught or worked with, some Jazzercised with, some have become friends with after I taught their children, all I have laughed with, they have shared their unique-from-me stories about life in America for a Black woman.
I have gained my perspectives on race from my life's experiences, faith, educating myself, and relationships. These are not videos I've watched, nor articles from news outlets; these are friends who have lived with racism their entire life and had to equip their children with the necessary tools to survive Living-While Black.
Maybe that's the most important difference between those who don't believe that systemic racism exists and those who know it's real, it's in whom one is in community with - who do you hang out with? Maybe if one's community was broader, actual friends - not simply those you see and wave to but instead seek out to talk, be a part of a Book Club, or go to coffee or dinner with, there would be less divisiveness? I do know that one's perspective is the sum of life's experiences and interactions.

I am choosing to be FOR, aka stand with my Black, Brown, POC friends and students because their lives do matter a great deal to me, as well as be, FOR law enforcement.

It's possible, friends.